CONSCIOUS
ANGER
CONSCIOUS
ANGER
...if anger is taboo, thought will starve to death.
Conscious Use Of Rage
Conscious or Unconscious Anger
Your Unsophisticated Ways Of Handling Rage
UNCONSCIOUS USE OF ANGER:
from Israel Kairós
I'm sharing some of my edge-Noticing about my Anger discoveries.
1. Anger is very efficient to Commit myself, in accordance with the time to develop Agreements using fear. My Conscious Anger is much more effective. The Attentiveness of Conscious Anger sharpens my sense of listening. However to hear what is important to the others, or the real need of the others, that leads to the need for an agreement, Conscious Sadness is more effective.
When I tried to use my Conscious Anger to create a deal with my partner, it was a disaster. The energy of Anger drove me to be more direct and practical, and this opened a space for Low Drama from Reactivity. After trying several times I just had to go to my room and cry a lot. I listened to my Sadness, and what she told me was to use Sadness to further refine my Proposal by listening more deeply to my partner's needs. The result was incredible. In 3 minutes, we created Agreements with a lot of Connection using Conscious Sadness, and then I used my Conscious Anger to commit myself to the new Experiments in the Agreements we created.
2. I can use 10% Conscious Rage to be completely Unhookable to Gremlin hooks. It is very interesting to note that when I am just not available to feed my Gremlin or the Gremlin of the other (without having to specifically say I'm not available) the Boxes run out of ways to create tension or conflict, and the Gremlins cannot take over.
3. I can use 15% Conscious Anger in my transformational listening space to create an Extraordinary space without domination of Gremlins and Boxes. My Anger keeps my Sword Of Clarity to hand, so I am clear about not wanting to know about the Gremlin or the person's Box. I can then stay focused on being in connection with and listening to the BEING of the other.
4. I can use 20% of Phase 2 Conscious Anger to create a Context in a Space of Radical Honesty, Radical Responsibility, and Radical Relating where I invoke the Adult within every BEING in the Space.
5. I can use 10% Conscious Anger to make a Bubble Of Personal Space and a Grounding Cord much more 'firm'. The way I do this is to intentionally direct the energy of my Anger into the 'click' of my Clicker like a little energetic explosion of Declaring in my fingers.
How to Hold Space For Someone to Unleash Their Conscious Anger
Holding space for someone to learn how to feel their anger - probably for the first time - does not happen through "pushing" them to feel. People are already angry, you do not have to make them angry. Pushing someone to feel their feelings is as abusive as pushing someone to not feel their feelings. Your job as a spaceholder is to hold a safe space for your client to take a risk in expressing an energy they might have never experienced before.
The safety comes from you providing thoughtware upgrades and new distinctions that your client are missing to inner navigate their conscious Anger (and Sadness, Fear and Joy).
The safety comes also from you being unhookable to their Gremlin strategies who might make you want to believe that:
- They don't feel anger ever
- They can feel their anger without making sound
The safety comes from your commitment to their commitment to growing up in relation to their Anger.
Here aress ome core distinctions in learning to feel Anger:
1. Upgrading the capacity to feel, express and use Anger consciously happens mostly through the voice, not the body. Rage work is mostly voice work, not body work.
When someone is learning how to feel, if they do not make sounds above 21% intense anger they are not feeling their anger. They are most probably thinking they are feeling. Thinking happens in the mind. Feeling happens in the heart.
Ask and / or tell your client what % of conscious anger they are experiencing. If there is no sound, then it is less than 21%.
If someone is showing physical sign of anger (sweat, aggitation, hyperventilation, etc...), and they are not making sounds, then their anger is UNCONSCIOUS. Which means your client has a high numbness bar, and their anger is not expressed consciously.
Ask them what survival strategy have they developped to suppress their anger: imploding, exploding, depression, hysteria, withdrawing, ...?
and
Notice how they are suppressing experiencing their conscious anger right now, and tell them all the ways: you blow it out, you hold it in in your chest, you go in your head, you have an image about anger instead of feeling angry, etc...
2. If your client is afraid of big sounds or making big sounds, it is often because they have were the subject of unconscious anger in their life - most often their parents - which came with violent shouting. Big sounds is then wired in them with their earlier experience. The healing process to be able to hear and be fine around big sounds is for your client to realize that they have the same sound inside of themselves, and that when they express the sound consciously, they become bigger than the sounds. The sounds are not bigger than them anymore.
3. Take it slowly.
For a man, it is huge to learn how to feel consciously anger. It requires that a part of their identity has to die. All their Anger about the patriarchy, about the sacrifices they had to make to be accept among the patriarchs, about how they had to disconnect themselves from Nature, the Feminine and the authentic Masculine, about how their mother made them into good boy or tried to 'kill' them, on and on and on, ... Men have huge Anger and in the patriarchy, they are never allowed to feel any of it. Feeling that anger is a betrayal of the patriarchy.
As a spaceholder, keep in mind that all of this is at work when a Men starts unleashing their Anger. Keep the big perspective in mind.
4. Hint for spaceholder: Try to remember how it was for you to learn to feel your conscious anger, what you heard your own spaceholder say, what you needed to hear, what helped, what didn't. Keep a foot in your first experience of feeling conscious anger so you can have compassion for your client, without rescuing them.
Maya Luna, Read full article here
Resources
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Experiments
Experimenting means to practice simple skills that build together into greater competence.
Competence to one woman seems like magic to another.
Magic is competence in an uncommon dimension.
By lowering your Numbness Bar, you can sense into the subtlest sensations of Anger, telling you about things you want to change and improve in your life. You don't have to look anywhere else to find the fuel for making those changes, big or small.
Making Changes, Part I
To start this experiment, dive over to SPARK107 and do all the Experiments there. After you have done those, come back here for the 2nd Part of this Experiment:
Making Changes, Part II
Choose a small element of your life that you want to make better. Examples: the cleanliness of your bathroom, your desk, the homepage of your website, the way you are present when someone tells you their name.
Use less than 10% intensity Conscious Anger to make that thing better. Possibilities for doing this:
- Sit down with your Beep! Book. Generate low intensity Anger in your body to sense into the element you chose. Let your anger inform you on what needs to be changed. "I want a shower curtain with wooden rings, not plastic. I want my pens and pencils separated in different containers. I want to repeat every name I hear when I meet the new students tomorrow".
Write down what you find.
Choose three actions you will do. Do them. Each time you do them, notice the sensations in your body after. Did it get better?
Keep going until you have 3 success stories. Celebrate.
Describe your experiment and its outcome in your Beep! Book.
After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code CONANGER.01 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
Choose a larger, more complex thing you want to improve in your life. An agreement, a plan, an assumption, a decision or a story that you hold about yourself. For example, you might want to improve:
- the agreement you made with your partner about how you talk about feelings together
- the assumptions you make about what is possible for you and your creativity
- the story you have about yourself in which you decided you failed miserably by not studying something you liked at university.
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Your Box is a filter that defines what is possible for you in terms of relationship, family, job, money, Love, time, authenticity, et cetera. When you leave your comfort zone, you arrive at the edge of your Box. When you reach the edge of your Box, you experience Fear and your Box will tell you to back off and stop. This is the way your Box eliminates options and change. Anything outside of your Box you cannot conceive of, see, sense, experience, imagine, describe, or create.
After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code CONANGER.03 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
Your Gremlin is a part of you that is dedicated to a specific set of Shadow Principles, your Hidden Purpose.
After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code CONANGER.04 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
This experiment is about experiencing discipline.
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Stories are not true. They are Stories. So much of our daily lives consist of Stories. We make Stories up to serve Conscious or Unconscious Purposes. The one True Thing is that everything comes without a Story. Nature is neutral. Things are, and things occur, without any Story attached. Stories take energy to make. If there is a Story attached to something, someone put it there for a Purpose, whether they are aware of that Purpose or not. What is, is meaningless. As someone once said in Possibility Management, "There are only two things in life: bullshit, and nothing."
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Your Anger tells you what you care about, and is fuel for you to create. This experiment is about using your anger to create an article.
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Your heart is for giving to the people you love. Your heart is nurtured by intimacy in Radical Relating.
Your soul (your Being) is for giving to your destiny, your Quest. Your Being is nurtured by you being turned on by your project.
This experiment is about distilling what the current Project of your Quest is.
Part I
1. Read SPARK 033. Do the experiment offered there.
Part II
1. Get together with a group of Possibilitators.
2. Do 333 together.
3. Take turns, one being the 'Rager' and the others holding space and taking notes. Set a timer for 5 minutes. As a Rager, you use at least 25% Anger to declare:
Turn up your Anger. Keep going. Do not stop to think. Repeat sentences that are meaningful to you as often as you want, deepen them more. You do not have to come up with 188 different things. The spaceholders can give you feedback and coaching as you go on, for you to really tap into your Rage and into what matters to you.
4. After 5 minutes, you are done, tell your team members what most landed in you. Your team members tell you what most landed in them. As a Rager, take notes. Then, the next person rages.
5. Take 10 minutes to write about what you harvested from your Rage. Write down all the details and possibilities that come to mind and heart. Also tap into the unknown, writing more than you know.
6. Choose one action that is the first, next step for realising your project. Let your team members know what this step is.
After completing the experiment, enter a description of your project and Matrix Code CONANGER.08 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
This experiment is about using your Anger for your project.
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This experiment is about feeling the effect of using Anger when you are cleaning up. Do this experiment the next time you are facing a physical mess.
After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code CONANGER.10 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
Messes happen in all sorts of forms. Do this experiment next time you notice there is an energetic mess. Maybe communication broke down and reactivity and chaos happened. You can sense it in how the space or relationship shifted, and how it is palpable - the 'elephant in the room' sensation. Maybe there was an accident, and the physical mess got taken care of but you can sense energetically there is still mess. For this Experiment:
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Become a pioneer in de-zombification.
"A considerable percentage of the people we meet on the street are people who are empty inside, that is, they are actually already dead. It is fortunate for us that we do not see and do not know it. If we knew what a number of people are actually dead and what a number of these dead people govern our lives, we should go mad with horror."
G.I. Gurfjeff
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In Modern Culture, we have learned to avoid responsibility. We make promises that sound good with no intention of actually doing the thing. We don't even know we are making a promise we are not going to keep, or we pretend we don't know.
After completing this experiment, please register Matrix Code CONANGER.13 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
For one whole month, make no promise that you don't keep.
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When someone says or does something and you get offended, this is unconscious emotional anger that comes from your self-importance.
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In school and at home we have been trained to leave our hands lifeless. We are supposed not to fidget, doodle, touch or take things as we listen to years of food for our intellectual body in school, or as we 'be good' and wait while the grown-ups to finish their endless conversation with an old neighbour in the street.
The power that drives us to use our hands is up to 7% Anger. This experiment is about learning to use this Anger so that your hands come back to life again. With your hands you can express, shape space, describe, tell stories, show worlds, touch, stop, invite, create, call, direct and establish things, people, energy or sound in a space. Let your hands get Wild again.
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We have been trained to be nice people, have no wrinkles, have a sweet personality, and as a result our face muscles are dead and we have a plastic lifeless faces with atrophied muscles. This experiment is about bringing your face back to life.
After three days, please register Matrix Code CONANGER.18 and your YouTube link in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
So much of our anger is held in our jaw. We grind our teeth. Conscious Anger is expressed with mouth open and teeth showing.
After a week you (and your Team or Rage Club) can enter Matrix Code CONANGER.19 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
Watch three of the 100 Emotional Healing Process demo videos on the Create Possibility website and do it right along with them. We recommend:
#96: Learning To Feel Anger / Boundaries With Mother
#35: 3-3-3 Practice Distinctions
#64: Cleaning Out The Heart And Being Reborn
#54 Making boundary with Dad
#32 Reclaiming Anger
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The practice of 3-3-3 is to do 3 minutes of rage, 3 times a week, for 3 months. It rewires your nervous system and expands the capacity of your Emotional Body to access and experience the energy of Anger.
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Clarity does not appear in your mind, contrary to what we have been hammered into at school. Modern culture teaches us that if you understand, comprehend and are logical then you have the tool you need to live life. Actually, our experience has shown us that understanding is a hindrance to life.
Clarity is not held in your mind, it is held in your 5 bodies and in particular, distinctions are held in your energetic body. Distinctions create Clarity. Clarity creates Possibility.
Your Sword of Clarity is an energetic tool. If you try to understand this, it won't work. If you sense it, you can find out how having your Sword of Clarity on your side, or ready for action in your dominant hand, sharpens your ability to make distinctions about this or that, now or later or never, yes or no, me or you or the other person or no one, stop or go.
This experiment is about integrating the sensation of having a sword on your side.
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Why do you think Chefs often seem to be angry? They are using their anger to create. This experiment is about using your own Conscious Anger to create.
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This experiment is about using more Anger than your Box would normally let you.
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People try to learn to juggle in all kinds of states, and it doesn't work. If you use Anger consciously, you can learn to snatch the fucking balls out of the air and keep them where they belong to successfully juggle. Each move is Experimental, and you need to be the Experimenter.
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In your Beep! Book, write "I am angry because..." and write why you are angry.
Keep going for half an hour. In the middle of the anger writing break your pen and throw it across the wall and get a new pen.
Do this once a day for 3 days. Then edit all that you have written into an Article that might make a difference for someone else because of your distinctions, practical examples, possibilities, and inspiring stories. Publish your article. Please register Matrix Code CONSANGR.26 in your free account at StartOver.xyz. This Experiment is worth 1 Matrix Point.
In public, if possible, do yoga on a mat, in special clothes and do Anger Yoga. GO for it. Use loud sounds. Make faces. Don't hurt yourself.
Do it for at least half an hour, once a day for three days.
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NOTE: This website is a Bubble in the Bubble Map of the free-to-play massively-multiplayer online-and-offline thoughtware-upgrade matrix-building personal-transformation real-life adventure-game called StartOver.xyz. It is a doorway to experiments that upgrade your thoughtware so you can relocate your point of origin and create more possibility. Your knowledge is what you think about. Your thoughtware is what you use to think with. When you change your thoughtware, you go through a liquid state as your mind reorganizes itself. Liquid states can bring up transformational feelings and emotions. By upgrading your thoughtware you build matrix to hold more consciousness and leave behind a low drama life of reactivity. No one can upgrade your thoughtware for you. More interestingly, no one can stop you from upgrading your thoughtware. Our theory is that when we collectively build 1,000,000 new Matrix Points we will change the morphogenetic field of the human race for the better. Please choose responsibly to read this website. Reading this whole website is worth 1 Matrix Point. Doing any of the experiments earns you additional Matrix Points. Please use Matrix Code CONANGER.00 to log your Matrix Point for reading this website on StartOver.xyz. Thank you for playing full out!